Hey kids, wanna learn what signs of botulism look like?
Since the sell by date wasn’t for another 4 days I returned them. I was checking out at the store and I was like “i’m not sure you want to take them out of the bag” and he did and a passing manager was just like “That looks like a bomb, I’m just gonna take it to the back” and was off like a shot.
Okay but seriously, if you have a package of food like this or especially if you have a can that is bulging like this, it is literally full of poison, do not open it and absolutely positively do not eat it under any circumstances.
Any food packaging that is bulging has to be considered unsafe to eat. A lot of people who might be living on their own for the first time don’t know what that looks like, and this is a really, really extreme example, but yeah if the top of a can has become slightly domed from internal pressure that’s going to kill you, don’t eat it.
So I had the Muppet Show season 2 dvd when I was young, just before I was being active online. On the Steve Martin episode there was a segment about singing fruits and vegetables, singing a cover of the old timey song “Yes! We have no bananas.”
The fact that the lyrics went “and yes we have no bananas” and not “and yet we have etc” puzzled me as a kid, and it was on my mind when I was thinking of a username. This was the dawn of 2013, so “lol, random, cheeseburger, kitties, so random!!XD” was still in vogue at the time, and I figured “And yet (we have) no bananas” was a variant of the phrase “everything but the kitchen sink” and since that was my vibe at that point, that’s what I went with as a username.
Funnily enough, when I was looking for public domain versions of the song, I discovered there were expanded lyric versions that explained the joke? In the song, the narrator introduces the greek produce stand vendor, saying “look at how wacky this guy is! He says yes when he means yes, and says yes when he means no. How comical!”
So yeah. Me having this username for 11 years is the result of me missing the joke this whole time. Not that i’d trade it for anything~
a bit of a serious ask, sorry… your posts have been slowing down a lot lately. i’m a bit afraid to ask, but is this the upcoming end of an era? you’ve been on tumblr for a while now, so i wouldn’t be surprised if you’re tired of it or just… don’t have anything more to post, y’know? all good things must come to an end and while i hope this isn’t it just yet, i wouldn’t blame you. you are an adult with a personal life and personal matters to attend to, which are infinitely more important than a silly little tumblr blog.
besides that, i hope you’re healthy and happy and that life is treating you well. thanks for all the laughs and good times!
Buddy I’ve been traveling the past 4 fucking days, and before that, I had two days in a panicked stupor over trying to get an urgent passport meeting set up in Seattle so I could fly out - if u don’t count this week, I have been consistently churning out the most epic posts ever seen almost daily since birth, son
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